Three Lessons of Coaching I Wish I Could Tell My Younger Self
Shawn Jones
DIRECTOR, ATHLETICS
Shawn has 30 years of head basketball coaching experience combined with 11 years as an athletic director. He has coached in Colorado and Texas, and has taken teams to three Final Four tournaments and a state championship. He has seen numerous players of his continue on to compete at the college and professional level of the sport. He is also proud to have seen many of his athletes become high school and collegiate coaches themselves. As director of athletics, Shawn is a key member of Ballogy’s team, driving the company’s athletic strategy, partnerships, coach engagement, and product vision. He has been married to his high school sweetheart for 32 years and they have raised three wonderful children together. Shawn has a passion for player development and the desire to assist coaches with effective, time-saving tools of administering and assessing skill development drills.
After 30 years coaching high school basketball, there are MANY, MANY things I would like to go back and tell my younger self to advise that young, energetic kid how to do it better, avoid problems, and get the most enjoyment out of the career. However, I will focus on the three biggest takeaways that I think I needed to hear.
1. Relationships are bigger than Championships.
As I look back over the years, the most rewarding seasons have been the ones where I was closest to my players, in spite of the success of the team. I forget wins and losses, but lasting relationships are still enjoyed to this day, and the rewards of hearing young adults telling me how I changed their lives by teaching them accountability, punctuality, or respect for people are invaluable. Seeing them become productive, successful people is phenomenal. I have found that no matter if winning or losing, when the relationships are the focus, enjoyment is great. When they are not, winning isn’t even fulfilling. I also look back at some of the most successful seasons and notice that the relationships were stronger and healthier than most less-successful years. No coincidence!
2. Don’t coach looking over your shoulder.
Too often…(OK, every year), coaches like me worry about doing a good enough job, winning enough games, or pacifying enough parents or school board members to keep our jobs. It is INSANE! This isn’t the NBA. We aren’t compensated with million dollar contracts to justify putting up with that pressure. We are high school coaches pouring our emotions, energies, and lives into teenagers for a stipend that wouldn’t be enough for a down payment on a new car! Quit looking over your shoulder worried about getting fired. My Dad always told me, “Who has the job right now? You do. Do the job well. Next year will take care of itself.” That is great advice that I rarely allowed to take root in my brain. I wish I would have done a better job of just ignoring the critics and coaching with clear emotions and full autonomy of knowing the job is mine right now. My non-supporters would likely still not support me in spite of any success, and my supporters would likely still support me in spite of any failures. Don’t worry about the politics. Just coach your team!
3. Parents become blind and crazy over their own kids.
So many times I have witnessed really good people turn crazy in an instant. Outside of the school they are the most incredible, kind, giving people you will ever meet. Involve their child in the mix with athletics or academics, and let me tell you, people turn CRAZY! I wish I had learned this early in my career. Too often I tried to reason and have a logical conversation with them about the realities of their son’s or daughter’s performance. I tried to include them in conversations and considerations of which team the child should be placed on, where they should play, or how they were playing, etc. They can’t see it. Instead of seeing and understanding that their kid is shooting 12% from the floor, parents only see that it must be the way the other players pass him the ball.
Don’t involve parents in coaching discussions or decisions. Be very cautious about forming close friendships with players’ parents… at some point it will put you in a tough position. Parents are blind and crazy. I learned it late in my career. Be friend-ly without being friends. Once I divorced myself from being close to the parents in daily conversations, my coaching became much easier and clearer. I had a job to do, and the electricians, plumbers, insurance salesemen, and truck driver parents didn’t bring much basketball knowledge to my table, even though they THINK they do. Let them do their jobs and you do yours. I don’t tell my dentist how to fill a cavity, and I don’t want him telling me how I should defend European back picking action.
The Bottom Line
The game has evolved greatly over the years and coaches must evolve as well in strategy, style, and preparation. What hasn’t changed since Dr Naismith created the game is PEOPLE. Whether it is in building relationships, ignoring politics, or managing parent involvement, the people factor will always be there. I wish I could go back and give my young coaching self these nuggets of advice to make my career more enjoyable. Don’t miss the wonderful relationships you will form with your players for life. Don’t let the adults ruin your fun. It’s your job today. Do the job well. Next year will take care of itself.